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Download free Acrobat Reader DC software, the only PDF viewer that lets you read, search, print, and interact with virtually any type of PDF file. Adobe Acrobat Reader DC The best PDF viewer just got better with the new Acrobat Reader. He Comes Next (2006) is the ultimate guide to understanding the desires of men and the intricacies of their sexual response process. This understanding that can help bring more pleasure than your male sexual partner has ever experienced before.

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Transform Yourself from 'Passion Victim' to Passionista!
In the smash hit She Comes First, Ian Kerner singlehandedly waged battle against male sexual 'ill-cliteracy,' and women everywhere benefited from his 'viva la vulva' philosophy of female pleasure. Now, in Passionista, it's time to learn all about what turns men onand makes them stay on. In this point-by-point, 'blow-b...more

Published January 10th 2006 by William Morrow (first published January 1st 2006)

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Sexuality Published in Decade: 2000s

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Rating details

Jan 29, 2013Natasha rated it really liked it

Yes, I actually read the whole book and added it to my GR shelf for the whole world to see. Shy? Nopes! This is way 'tamer' than the erotica we read every day ;)
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Sooooo, if you are looking for book filled to the brim with sex tips & positions, don't read this. This book isn't aimed at newbies, but rather couples that have been in a relationship for a long time and crave more intimacy with their partner and would like to rekindle some of that sexual excitement that was there in th...more

Apr 17, 2007Ligia Ayala rated it liked it

Ok. Here is what I'll say about why I own this book: No one ever taught me anything positive about sexual desire or money in my household as I was growing up. Those are perhaps the most taboo subjects in our intimate lives. While intimacy in relationships is not all about sex, we can not deny its importance. I only wish someone would write a book that explained the intrinsic desire to spend money I don't have...then I'd be taboo free.
The author wrote 'She Comes First' a couple of years before th...more

Jan 26, 2012Lisa rated it really liked it

Wonderful read and many good hands-on lessons, if you can keep up. Ian does a good job in giving detail suggestions on how to use your hands, body, and mind while creating a connection with your lover. According to Ian these techniques will help you to gain more confidence in the bed and become more assertive in giving your lover pleasure. Many ah times I was aroused just taking my time savoring on each lesson. It will take a few times to read it and let it soak in to really grasp each technique...more

*A great big O*
I'd give this book a big O for outstanding. This book goes beyond just serving as a how-to on having great sex, but first and foremost provides a how-to on having a great relationship. (And, believe it or not, the two really are connected.) Continually entertaining, informative, and insightful from cover to cover, this book will likely suck (ok, puns are hard to avoid in writing this review) you in from the start and keep your attention throughout. As the author conveys throughout...more

May 06, 2014Kathryn Reimer rated it really liked it

A psychological and physiological guide to men's sexuality and a great reminder of where your husband is coming from (pun intended.)

Mar 07, 2008Shauna rated it it was amazing

Recommended to Shauna by: me!

Really good book...probably not what you think. If you have low self esteem this book is good for making you feel sexy! I suggest it to all women, as well as suggest 'She Comes First' to all men!

I got this book to better understand the opposite sex and educate myself on all things penis related. LOL This book fit the bill. I learned a lot about what makes my partner tick both physically and emotionally that I did not know, as well as was reassured that what I did know was accurate. It opened up a dialog between my partner and I as well by creating an empathetic understanding in me for what he, as a male, goes thru on a daily basis, not just sexually. This book is mostly NOT about sex bu...more

It is a great book! The author gives a lot of info on how to please a man.
Girls, if you think you know how to please your man - think again!
I'm not gonna say much, just read the book and you'll see why I call it my bedroom bible :P

I really like reading a book written by a man with a femenist point of view.

I recommend this book to all women. It is clever and it explains a lot of the psychology behind sex and men. Plus it is a fun read.

May 25, 2015Guylou rated it really liked it · review of another edition

Overall the book was interesting, but nothing really new was uncovered. I think this would be a great book for young inexperienced ladies!

found this while shelving, but i may have to go to another branch to check it out. i have to work with these people, after all.

So this one was also informative. I like how Part 1 is more theoretical and gives the reader something like a crash course on male anatomy and psychology while Part II is about HOW to go about acheiveing a desired result. One can always skip straight to Part II but I think it's best to read it in order. I did read She Comes First in order and I learned quite a lot about my own body that I didn't know before. Very Informative, educational books that you can go back to again and again while trying...more

Leaned more about myself than I thought I would. It is a great social look at men and women, and the author point you to a number of other books I want to look at. I will let you know. I think this one should be on the list of books for all to take in a class in college, like the 'Human Ape' it explains a great deal. Now Ron and I are reading the first book, 'she comes first' Will let you all know on this one, as it is referred to a great deal in this book and I am now interested in self discove...more

This book's precursor 'She Comes First' felt more informative and the techniques detailed there are almost more useful in pleasuring a man than the ones here.
Only about 1/6 of this book was actually focused on physical technique (which is fine since the author repeated almost too many times that men have emotional needs too) and that portion seemed rushed.
Overall, an interesting look at male arousal, but if you're expecting the playfulness and confidence of She Comes First, this isn't it.

Mar 02, 2014Sheree Tampus rated it liked it

I love Ian Kerner. He has a wonderful way of making sex more fun and meaningful without imposing silly rules and unnecessary pressure to perform.
However, I found the book a bit hard to finish even though I was so enthusiastic about this at the beginning.
The book became a bit too technical in the latter chapters.
Still, I enjoyed reading the book. It's very informative and entertaining. I will definitely keep this book around to read and reread again.

Jun 08, 2010Jan rated it it was ok

I started reading this book in the high hopes that it would inlighten me. Well it didn't. It was like reading a psych text book for a college class. I got 60% through it and became so bored reading it that I put it on my book shelf 7 months ago and it's been gathering dust ever since. Who knows, maybe one day I'll open it up again and finish it. I did pay for the damn thing, I need to at least get my moneys worth out of it.

Apr 22, 2009Carli rated it liked it

yes, yes, I'm interested in sexuality and I'd read some posts about this (and his other book She Comes First) on a couple of blogs. And hey, can't hurt to learn some new techniques, right?
Anyway, I thought Kerner's exploration of male sexuality was interesting- not your usual stuff, though it does seem that he has a very particular, monogamous committment-focused perspective. I'm intrigued by his theory of pelvic tension. You'll have to read about that yourself. :-)

Veeerry interesting. I might have gotten more out of this book if I had a partner who came a little bit closer to fitting the profile of 'sexually dominant and somewhat distant, uncreative in the sack' heterosexual male. But I still enjoyed it and would recommend it to others. Only the last 1/5 or so of the book is about what you might refer to as 'techniques.' The previous sections - covering topics from foreskin ('the best sex toy money can't buy') to pheromones - are far more interesting.

Holy lame. This book is only going to interest ladies if their sex life is the least imaginative thing ever, if their guys have no idea what they are doing and also probably have no emotional connection to themselves at all, and if one or both parties have serious hangups about even just vanilla sex. I read it in one sitting, and the only thing I could think the entire time was, 'Well, yes, OBVIOUSLY.' No dice, man.

Not my normal type of book I am interested in, however, I was pleasantly surprised.
(friends, please do not take my rating as an endorsement or recommendation of this book. I can't, in good conscience, recommend it. The language and subject matter is likely not your cuppa tea, and not just because you don't drink tea).

If you're a real beginner to sex, or never understood that it's more than an activity to fill a few bored hours, then this is a great book for you to read. Kerner stresses connection and genuine intimacy. Which is a great lesson for the Cosmo crowd, but if you're already there, his lessons can get tedious.
However, some of his more physical lessons were quite illuminating.

Sep 01, 2010Katey rated it liked it

There's a great line in the movie Clerks that is truthful in its brevity: 'Making a male climax isn't at all challenging. Insert somewhere close, preferably moist, thrust, repeat.'
This book doesn't completely disagree with that assessment. However, it does give a bit more food for thought, and perhaps a woman may take a few things for granted upon occasion (as well as men).

I really like the idea of this book; there is not a lot of sex education books written by men for the women. I liked the stories that the writer integrated within the concept and the physiological, chemical, and psychological happenings during, before and after. The final chapters of the book seemed a bit too technical; they did not interest me personally but the whole book is very helpful.

Jan 13, 2012Allison rated it really liked it

I read this book as a companion piece to She Comes First by the same author. I think I'm going to reread it before I write a review. First impression is that it looks to be pretty helpful for women to understand and support their man.

Nov 20, 2014Ellis rated it liked it

Wow! Perhaps if I'd read the full title of this book I wouldn't have read it. Personally, I am not a woman, and I have no interest in pleasuring a man. (My thanks to women who are so inclined, however.) That said, this book was pretty interesting.

Eh, was OK. Not really well written, IMHO, but I suppose there were a couple relevant points.
Would be way better to have an open conversation with one's male partner rather than waste time on the generalizations in this book.

Don't waste your time or energy. NOT the book I was expecting after I read 'She Comes First'. I was so disappointed I actually wrote the author and wanted my money back (didn't work by the way, but he did offer me some free online books).

About the psychology of men and sex--from the obsession with penis size to porn to the reasons why men and women approach everything differently-especially sex.

eh, I love to buy these types of books. Although there was some insights into the male psyche I didn't learn anything I hadn't figured out through experience.

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Ian Kerner is a nationally-recognized sexuality counselor and New York Times best-selling author of numerous books including the ever-popular She Comes First (Harper Collins). He writes a well known column for CNN and can often be seen on the TODAY Show and the Dr. Oz Show amongst others. He is regularly quoted as an expert in print and online media.
Ian is certified by the American Association of...more

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